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 What
are these little squares of latex and what am I going to do with them?
Please realize that dental dams were not originally designed for what you have
in mind. Dentists use them to isolate a tooth from the tongue, other teeth and
gums during dental procedures. However, some sensual individual (perhaps a
creative dental hygienist), thought of using dams for cunnilingus (oral contact
with female genitals) and analingus (oral/anal contact). And so, a new method of
playful, safer sex was born.
How do I use them?
Hold the dam against your partner's genitals while you lick, kiss or suck the
covered area. Either of you can hold the dam in place during these activities.
This may sound easier than it actually is, since it's sometimes difficult to
hold the dam firmly in place once the juices start flowing. But with a sense of
humor, and a little patience, you can have a lot of fun practicing.
What if the dam slips off?
Because dams tend to become slippery and slide around, we recommend that you
have several dams nearby and ready for use. Mark the dams on one side with a
pen, so that if the dam gets set aside during passionate foreplay, you'll know
which side is for the licker and which for the lickee. Better yet, use a fresh
dam and avoid the possibility of exchanging body fluids. We strongly advise that
you throw the dam away after one use.
Now the real challenge: How can I get my partner to use the dams? I'm not so
sure about them myself.
Practice alone first. Put the whole dam in your mouth. Lick it. How does it
taste? Better you should make that funny face now than when your face is between
your lover's legs. If the dam's flavor bothers you, wash it with a mild soap and
rinse it thoroughly.
Touch yourself with the dam brush it against your face, tickle and rub your
genitals with it, snap it against your skin. We encourage you to play with the
dams until you are embarrassed by how much you are enjoying them.
How can I start talking with my partner about using dams?
Dams are a great tool for starting a conversation about safer sex. Having them
handy and being able to talk about using them shows a concern for yourself and
others. When you feel the time is right -- we suggest a non-sexual setting, for
instance during dinner -- tell your lover or potential lover about the fun
you've been having with dental dams.
Have a dam handy so you can show the person what you're talking about. Spark
curiosity -- offer to share your toy and be the safer sex coach. Ask this
person's feelings about safer sex and listen to the response. Often just talking
about your feelings, whether you're shy, embarrassed, intimidated or excited,
can ease any tensions. Be prepared to negotiate around safer sex alternatives
which are acceptable to both of you.
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